I had quite a melt down two days ago. It was doozy.
My life sucks, I have no friends, nobody cares about me, if I disappear right now no one would even notice until they run out of towels. I'm a horrible Ma because I didn't make dinner. Everyone deserves better that me. Running is stupid. My blog is stupid. I'm stupid. I shouldn't try to give people hope or advice because I suck.
You know that kind of poor me drivel complete with the torrent of tears coursing down my face and me wiping my nose on the front of my shirt. Yeah, gross, but you get the picture. The problem is those kinds of melt downs are a foreshadowing of a imminent relapse. My husband pointed it out years ago that although I am an emotional person by nature, when I go into full-on life is hopeless, ugly cry mode then something is coming. It usually happens when I have overdone and pushed myself beyond my limits. Everything starts to hurt more. My left shoulder blade is the worst. My family hate when I start to say my shoulder aches because they know they will all be hit up to rub it. When I say rub it I mean stick your elbow on the spot until I bruise. The everyday noises of TV and conversation make me feel edgy. The fatigue becomes crippling. My symptoms don't always end in relapse. If I slow down and keep myself
cool and stress free I can sometimes head it off. My issue is that I
don't always listen to my body or my husband.
I am hoping this coming week I can stave off a major relapse. Swimmer Girl has a swim meet this weekend a few hours away and I am not going. It makes me sad, but my husband is going. Honestly I think they need to spend some time together anyhow. She's sixteen and knows soooooooo much more than he does. Oy, that is another blog. I'm just going to rest. I also noticed my diet needs some tweeking. Too much sugar and simple carbs tend to do an number on my system and exaggerate my symptoms. I can't help it though, who can walk past a bag of peppermint patties and not want to "taste the sensation". It will be back to swiss chard, and kale for me. They have very strong anti-inflammatory properties. Combine with steamed or grilled fish and you have a filling and yummy meal. I have been up to my ears in zucchini so I chop one up and toss in, super yums.
Are there symptoms that you have, that tell you to slow down or a relapse is coming?
Do you always listen to your body?
Do you find that diet plays a part in managing your symptoms?